Aisa kyu hota hai..

ham sabke andar nahin shayad yeh kehna zyada sahi hoga ki har ladki k andar do character hote hain...chaliye main apna hi udaharan dekar ise thoda aur spasht karne ki koshish karti hoon...mujhe ehsaas hota hai ki mere andar do character chhupe hue hain...pehle milte hain mukta ji se..woh bahut mature hain...zyadatar muamlon mein dimag se kaam leti hain..bahut bold hain..har decision boldly le sakti hain..aur kabhi kabhi leti bhi hain...thodi shy bhi hain..thodi sakuchi bhi aur thodi sehmi si bhi..duniya ki chhoo lene wali har buri nazar se khud ko bachhte hue apne tareeke se zindagi jeeti hai..uski koi bahut zyada tamanna nahin hain zindagi se..

ab milte hain doosre character se..woh thodi chulbuli hai..chhoti hai..shararti hai..bachchhi si hai...ziddi bhi hai..chalo uske charitra ko charitrarth karta ek naam use de dete hain..Nikki..ji yeh nikki bahut kuchh karna chahti hai..dher saari masti..uchhal kood..sharartein..saath hi chahti hai khud ko pamper karvana..bachchi hai na..par sach bahut pyari hai..sabko khush rakhna jaise uska lakshya ho..na to khud dukhi rehti hai aur na hi apne aas paas kisi ko dukhi rehne deti hai..

ab baat karte hain logon ki...woh jab mujhse milte hain to kyunki main pehle hi keh chuki hoon nikki zyada shararti hai..to pehle woh hi nazar mein aa jaati hai...mukta use chhipane ki poori koshish karti hai..par zyada der chhipa nahin paati..aur nikki ki dil lubhane wali mastiyan sabka dil moh leti hain...log nikki ko pasand karte hain..aur phir kyun na karein zindagi se bhari hui hai nikki..us-se baar baar milna chahte hain..uske saath jeena chahte hain...aur dheere dheere usko apne rang mein dhalne ka prayas karne lagte hain...aur kyunki main pehle hi keh chuki hoon nikki dimag se kaam nahin leti hai..bas dil ki sunti hai..woh us rang mein rangne lagti hai..woh nikki ko apna banne ka dikhava karke..shuru karte hain uske saath ek saazish...jismein woh use, uski har usi chanchalta par jo kabhi unhein lubhati thi, tok tok kar yeh kehte hain ki yeh theek nahin, woh theek nahin aur dheere dheere hatya kar dete hain nikki ki aur bas bach jati hai mukta...aur phir yeh kehkar ki ab tumhare andar ki nikki mein nikki jaisa kuchh bhi nahin, chal padte hai ek aur nikki ko dhoondhne aur uski hatye kar use tabdeel karne poori mukta mein!!

I M DEAD

Bahut pehle ke baat hai..tab kee jab main padha kartee thi..ek baar kisi ko kehte suna ki agar aap life mein satisfy ho jaayein to dead ho jaayenge..main uskee baat par hansi aur kaha aise thode hi hota hai..kaafi behas kee aur mera tark tha ki pehle to insaan kabhi satisfy hi nahin hota aur yadi ho bhi jaaye to woh to waise hi itni badi khushi hai ki use enjoye karte karte kab din guzar jayenge pata hi nahin chalega phir bhala koi aise mein dead kaise ho sakta hai.....

aaj khud hi k diye gaye tarkon par hansi aa rahi hai..khud ko hi samjha rahi hoon ki zindagi k chhote bade har tarha ke anubhav zaruri hain..kyunki jab tak hum kisi cheez ko anubhav nahin karte us par jo bhi bolte hain sab thotha hota hai..aaj jab ehsaas hua ki life mein bahut bada satisfaction ka keeda dheere dheere pravesh kar gaya hai to pata chala..jaldi jaldi sab kuchh paane ki chahat mein bhaag rahi thi..aur ab itni khaali ho gayi hoon ki samajh nahin aata ki apne liye kuchh aur paane ki chahat kahan se laaoon..ab lagta hai I M DEAD!!

U said it...

"Words...a two edged sword; they comfort; and they hurt"
i read theze lines so many times..cz one o' my frnd wrote these lines in his profile...nd i never understood d meaning d way i could have understood today.....after reading one more caption used by someone....."Life is a bliss........without you"

RISHTON KO BAAR BAAR SAMAJHNE KEE AARZOO,
KEHTI HAI; PHIR MILE; TO KAI BEWAFA MILE!!

kaisi paheli hai yeh kaisi paheli ZINDGAANI!!

kahin to yeh dil kabhi mil nahin paate
kahin pe nikal aayein janmon ke naate
bani yeh uljhan bairi apna mann
apna hi hoke sahe dard paraye...
......DARD PARAYE!!

Temptation is too strong to resist..

..zindagi kee race chal rahi thi.aur main usmein bhagey ja rahi thi..is ummeed ke saath ki main hi jeetungi..abhi aagey dekha to main sabko peechey chhod aai thi aur manzil bhi kareeb nazar aa rahi thi..is-se main ek celebration k mood mein aa rahi thi..us celebration ke mood mein aagey ki jagah bass ek baar peechey mud kar dekha..aur yeh kya wapas paltee to saamne ek gehra gaddha tha jo meri nigahon se peechey dekhne kee vajah se chhoot gaya..aur main itni speed mein thee ki ab kuchh nahin ho sakta tha..bahut tezi se oopar ki or uchhli..aur utnee hi tezi se aundhe munh zameen par aa padi..kuchh nahin bacha sivaye khoon ke...

kuchh log pyar ko bhi koshish ka naam de dete hain..huh..aur kuchh log koshishon ko bhi pyar ka naam dene se nahin chookte..

kuchh lines jo sateek meri kahani bayan kar rahi hai...kuchh is tarah se yaad aa rahi hai..
DIL KEE BASTI PURAANI DILLI HAI
JO BHI GUZRA USEE NE LOOTA HAI!!

...

Life z too short...this time it was big!!

....kash!!

Kash, koi chhoole mann..
deh chhuye bina!!